Adoption has to be Hard

Yesterday, my 17 year-old son, Ezekiel, said, “As I watch you and Dad adopt again, I’m seeing more similarities between physical adoption and our adoption into God’s family.” He leaned against the kitchen counter as I prepared for dinner and thought out loud, “Out of all the kids in Uganda, how did I get to be chosen to be in our family? If you think about it, there was nothing inherently desirable about me—it wasn’t that I was the cutest kid—”
    “That’s debatable,” I interjected. 
    He smiled and went on, “Or the greatest kid. It was just that God moved all the details into place. I was the right age (10) and lived near you guys.” He continued, “But what makes me valuable is the hard work you were willing to go through to adopt me. And what makes us valuable to God is the high price He had to pay to save us.”

Exactly. Our worth isn’t inherently found in us, but is evident by the price God was willing to pay for us. Amazing! It is ALL grace. Zeek then observed God’s orchestration of various providential details to make both Ella and Elijah qualify to be part of our family. We discussed the various steps that are still needed to adopt them, in addition to the high financial costs. I told him,

“Adoption has to be hard and expensive. Or it wouldn’t clearly represent our adoption into God’s family. It has to be a hard, heart-wrenching process. Or else it would cheapen the whole concept. My older 2 adopted children (Emma and Zeek) remember the long years of waiting and praying, taking trips to the embassy, immigration office, courthouses, and medical offices. They remember being left behind in Uganda when we couldn’t travel with them. And they remember the exultant day of finally receiving the court order of adoption. They get adoption. Our 10 year-old doesn’t remember much of his process. He only knows that we chose him to be our son because we wanted him. Kids of all ages need to be given homes, but there is something special when the older children will remember the “before and after” for the rest of their lives.

Adoption is expensive, time consuming, inconvenient, and hard. It has to be. But it is one more beautiful picture of the gospel displayed to the watching world. They need to see the crazy love of Christ followers so they can begin to comprehend the crazy love of our Saviour.

Would you consider adoption, fostering, or supporting adoption in some way? There are so many opportunities even in America that go unmaximized. It won’t be easy. It has to be hard. But we have nothing to fear. You can be strong and courageous since, “…the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Joshua 1:9).

1Comment
  • Raquel Brandt
    Posted at 22:14h, 02 July

    Would I have loved to be a fly in that kitchen that day….What a great reflection from this conversation! Thank you for your faithfulness and love! It motivates me to love and push through, and reminds me of the great cost of salvation.
    1 Peter 1:18-19 – knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ.
    It had to be hard! Praying for the beautiful Hurleys!